Everyone always assumes when I say I am packing my ho bag that I am packing a bag full of things meant to share with someone else. Lately my bag has been more about me than SHE OR HE. I am trying to understand MY sexuality more and enjoy MY body more so I am starting to think more about what makes me happy and me feel good. The things in my bag currently reflect that. The "Ho Bag" (available at www.caabcustoms or ig @caabcustoms) that I packed last night was a me date that I planned for myself at a local hotel here in Atlanta.
Pink Himalayan Sea Salt
I am busy during the week taking care of both business and personal issues. I rarely EVER take a soak it’s always a quick shower. The sea salt was packed as a reminder to slow down by having to take a bath I have to give me and my body time baths are not quick processes. I added a few drops of peppermint and lavender essential oil to the salt prior to packing it. Sea Salt baths encourage the releasing of stress, detoxification, the are known to ease aches and pains of the body, and are great for many skin issues including eczema and acne. NOTE- if you have circulatory issues consult your doctor before taking a sea based soak.
Whenever it’s not health necessary I prefer to not use condoms. (When you are having sex with shared toys, a partner, or toys that have pores PLEASE USE PROTECTION) Glass dildos are super easy to clean and don’t cause as many skin irritations as many rubber/cyberskin based toys so I am free to use them without a condom. They are super fun to put into the fridge or freezer and use cold. The temperature sensation feels better for me that the actual rubbing or penetration.
(if you want to learn more about the purple clitoral suction dildo I posted about please refer back to my two previous blog posts in the sexuality section of the blog)
I feel sexy with cute things on my feet that don’t cover my whole feet. I have a foot fetish I love my feet and I love seeing and touching others feet. So while some may think a sexy pair of black heels are awesome I personally like cute girly slippers. I also am trying to not walk around barefoot quite as much as getting pedicures all the damn time is getting expensive lol.
I don’t really need to bring a mirror. The mirror is a reminder for me to spend time in the mirror. I have so many insecurities it’s not even funny. I am plus size. I have never been skinny, but I have never been the weight I am now. While I am currently losing weight it’s still causes an impact to my self esteem. I have to do work to remind myself TO LOVE MYSELF EVERYDAY. Self esteem is not a packet of herbs I brought at the botanica and just sift into my tea every morning. It’s work! I only have one body I will never get another one. I make myself stare at my face and body in the mirror. During sensual time with myself I now get out the shower dry off in front of the mirror, oil down in front of the mirror, and even masturbate in front of the mirror sometimes. I realized that for a year I avoided mirrors. I avoided looking at my face and body, I was so ashamed and insecure that I didn’t even want to see what I looked like when I left the house sometimes. That was a bad year and I will NOT REPEAT those behaviors. I rub my stomach and all of it’s stretch marks, I comb my kinky ass hair slowly, I massage my breast that aren’t perky anymore, and of course I admire those feet I have such a fetish for lol.
Slutty Oils/ Perfume
I love to glow. I don’t care whether that glow is natural and something I added I am going to get that glow by any means necessary. The glow added to my bag is what I call my heaux oil but Jade Fox Co ( @jadefoxco on IG) calls it Vixen. It’s natural based and feels so fucking good. While I’m still damp I rub it all over my body (Except for my face) and it gives me a soft bronzy golden goddess shimmer without looking like a 1990’s Spice Girls Reject. I think I may pay $10-15 for a bottle that lasts me a few months as I don’t use it daily. My perfume is also by the same business. I sprayed it on the hotel’s comforter and a couple of the pillows.
Sometimes I take slutty pics for myself. Sometimes I take the to send to friends (yes I send my friends smut) or partners. The nipple covers are for when I don’t want full nudity. I love fun wild designed nippled covers. I currently and alternating between rainbow prints and glitter.
Elberry Sparkling Water
I am trying to give up majority of the sugar in my life. I realized that when I give up sugar low and behold weight falls the fuck off, my skin clears up, and my vagina doesn’t know what a yeast infection is anymore. So @jadefoxco owner Ashley Patrice put me on to fancy alternatives to sugary sweet drinks. Elderberry infused sparkling waters are low to no sugar having drinks that still taste good on the palette and they make me feel fancy on some real shit lol. I generally get my from the rich natural section at Krogers or you can grab some from Traders Joes for under $2 a bottle.
I wear yoni eggs almost every day. When I am on my cycle I remove them. When masturbating one in sometimes, during sex with a female partner I am also known to leave one in. I feel like a treasure chest when I have a semiprecious stone hidden in my coochie. What can I say? (shrug) I am currently selling a few of the stones I love the best on my site under the “lifestyle” section of the store.
Makes the slutty hard to capture pictures possible. $5 from Five And Below I have had mine for about 3 years and it is still going strong.
Candles (and lighter)
You already know they set the mood via softer lighting and smell.
My laptop is because I watch porn. Sometimes reading arouses me and sometimes watching arouses me. An amazing blogger Raquel Savage recently explained that free porn tube sites are basically like raping the artists who create the content. What paid monthly fee porn sites offer the most content and don’t hurt the creators?
I saved the best for last. I am not some eloquent writer but I have a deep love for words. My current faves are Royce Hall “Rioting at Dawn” and Nykieria Chaney “Fertile Ground”. I will not post an artist’s complete work but here are a few lines from two of their poems.
Except From Midnight Whore- Chaney
...I’m not trying to wife you
No commited lives
Just trying to chisel some steel inside on you
Kiss roses chasing fire one monster at a time
Floating on curled toes
Twisted dancing on slick thighs
Violated bedside manners forgotten in thoughtless
Insatiable desire full of greed and redemption
This ain’t your freedom song, I just wanna make
Loving Venus- Hall
Envelop my rising sun
I become her moon
Submerged in her dark matter
As the tides elevates and flow
With every oblige to her wishes
I quilt her cosmos...